


drops in a bucket

by deniigiq



Series: Blindspot and the Ordeal of Being Known [14]
Category: Daredevil (Comics), Daredevil (TV), Deadpool (Movieverse), Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Cults, Gen, Internet, Scams, Social Media, Team Dynamics, Team Red, multi-level marketing, pyramid schemes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:27:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28276860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deniigiq/pseuds/deniigiq
Summary: A fourth spam message was the end of Sam’s line. It hadn’t even been five minutes. This was it. He was done.“Guys,” he announced to the room, “I’m joining a pyramid scheme.”(Sam joins a pyramid scheme out of spite.)
Relationships: Matt Murdock & Peter Parker & Wade Wilson, Peter Parker & the copycats, Samuel Chung & Social Media
Series: Blindspot and the Ordeal of Being Known [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1658656
Comments: 22
Kudos: 375





	drops in a bucket

**Author's Note:**

> references to cults/cult behavior, scamming/exploitation, and past child abuse below.

He was minding his own business, watching Achara test Matt on the street names of Hell’s Kitchen via Google Maps to the shock, horror, and amusement of the two people left in the waiting room when the first spam message came in.

It was no problem. He deleted it, then went back to half-assed-ly trying to research the date of a subpoena that was allegedly filed.

Matt tried to explain to Achara that knowing street names in New York wasn’t hard because they were all. Numbers. Child.

“You need cardinal directions and you’re set,” Matt huffed.

“Yeah, but what if you can’t see the sun,” Achara deadpanned.

Leilani stopped typing to stare a hole into the side of her face like that girl from _The Ring_. Matt’s forehead crumpled in like he was trying to figure out if this was attitude or an honest question.

The next spam message came in. Sam deleted it.

“Do you think I go by the sun, hon?” Matt asked Achara.

“Well, yeah. What else could you go by?”

One of the people in the waiting room shielded their eyes in horrified second-hand embarrassment.

“Achara, please look at me. What’s this?”

“A stick.”

“Why do I have a stick, sweetheart?”

A third message came in, and that was it. Sam deleted it after seeing the first two letters of the message.

“To go places?”

“Why do I need a stick to go places?”

“Because the dog’s tired? I dunno, Mr. Murdock, that’s between you and her, isn’t it?”

Sam felt Matt brush past him on the way back into the Lawyer Containment Zone for emotional support from Foggy. He wouldn’t find it. Foggy had either finally given up the ghost and died at his office desk or he’d left hours ago for the meeting with the Swan couple.

Sam heard Matt bustle out of Foggy’s office through the wall and go into Kirsten’s instead. Kirsten told him to get the fuck out, she was on the phone.

A _fourth_ spam message was the end of Sam’s line. It hadn’t even been five minutes. This was it. He was done.

“Guys,” he announced to the room, “I’m joining a pyramid scheme.”

Months, he’d been putting up with this. MONTHS.

Days upon days upon weeks of ‘hey, BT, buy these shoes.’ ‘hey, BT, buy this cologne.’ ‘Hey, BT, I know you’re busy, but could you promo my page?’

‘Do you do ads?’

‘Can you boost my store?’

‘Lol, you’re soooooooo funny, come to my party, there’ll be so much on offer.’

‘Are you a Christian, BT?’

‘Would you like a consultation, free of charge?’

FUCK.

OFF.

Sam had negative money. Zip. Zilch. He had rent and train fair and the extra couple hundred that was left over after that was deducted from his wages went right off to keeping the lease of a shitty shoebox shaped apartment in the middle of Chinatown, NYC, alright?

What was hard about this? Where were these people getting the idea that he had money to purchase anything that was not directly relevant to transit, calories, or sleeping space?

MNM paid a helluva lot better than janitorial work—don’t get him wrong, but he wasn’t out here making bank as a paralegal. Especially one with no credentials to speak of.

So these fucks and their side hustles needed to lay the fuck off before Blindspot went and found that sweet little block button and abused the ever-loving shit out of it until only two of his followers were allowed to speak to him for the rest of time.

He was done. He’d had it.

He was giving these people a taste of their own goddamn medicine.

He didn’t even research any of the billion schemes that Google flung into his face when he found that sweet, sweet buzz word ‘direct sales.’

No. Fuck them. They didn’t deserve his actual skills. No, he picked the first one that showed up on the first page he clicked on.

He was selling sneakers now, everyone go sit down and shut up. Take his email. Take his phone number. Fuck yeah, give him an on-boarder. A manual? Don’t mind if I do.

Actually no. Fuck off, he wasn’t reading any of this so-called ‘literature.’ He knew how this worked. He was bombarded with it day in and day out.

He had two hundred dollars to spare this month after bills, rents, and savings and he was using it to start his own business. Take _that_ , Twitter. Take _that_ , Instagram. What’re you gonna do about it? Complain? Ask him to boost all these other shops?

Too bad, suckers. Sam was a capitalist now. He was a stone-cold bitch-boss with a heart of gold. And he had just bought two pairs of shoes to sell to two people who could buy the same damn thing from the original website for half the listed price, but was that a him-problem?

No.

No, it was not. This wasn’t about the money.

This was about human decency. And he had a point to prove.

**@blindspot:** heyyyy friends guess who’s selling Sneakpeeks now? Big hint: it’s THIS guy. I’ve got a whole inventory of TWO for all you sneakerheads with no taste out there. Hmu for the price. It’s a violent rip-off, but hey, I’ll sign ‘em if it makes you swoon 😉💋❤

 **@cattle_bow:** good god BT has up and lost his damn mind

 **@hwchamp:** are you? Okay?

 **@JJxyz98:** I feel like this is a threat

 **@HReality:** @JJxyz98 that’s because it IS a threat

 **@punisherimritehere:** uh, should someone grab one of the spideys to make sure BT’s okay?

 **@blindspotnoticeme:** @LittleSpidey @spiderman4.0 HELP

Look at all these naysayers. Look at all these people pleading with him to turn back before the drop.

Alas, NO. He was here. This was him. 100% Authentic him. The 5-page handbook’s front page told him so.

**@LittleSpidey:** @blindspot dude what’s going on, fam?

 **@spiderman4.0** **:** @blindspot not you too.

 **@blindspot:** idk what that means guyssss. I’m just being ME. I’m searching out my FULL POTENTIAL.

 **@punisherimritehere:** @LittleSpidey @spiderman4.0 I’m so bad at tone. Is he joking right now?

 **@spiderman4.0:** uh. Texting now.

 **@LittleSpidey:** hold that thought friend.

**S2:** Sam are you okay?

 **S4:** yeah dude this twitter thing is freaking people out

 **BT:** IM GREAT.

 **SM:** OMG ME TOO

 **S2:** Spidey no, you’re manic, go back to sleep

 **SM:** the fuck is sleep? where is my car?

 **SM:** PSYCH

 **SM:** I DON’T HAVE A CAR AHAHAHAHAHAHAH I CANT EVEN DRIVE

 **S2:** sir, I can’t deal with two shitheads at once. I’m gonna have to ask you to leave.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Where the hell did you go you little shit???

 **SM:** YOU CANT KEEP ME LOCKED UP FOREVER

 **S2:** wade please

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Don’t worry I got him. Hey Pete. You know what I’ve got?

 **SM:** John Jonah Jameson

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : no think smaller

 **SM:** the president of the united states

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : smaller

 **SM:** an alien raccoon

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : I’ve got Easy Cheese.

 **SM:** 👁

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : you want some?

**SM: give**

**DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : pspspspsspspspsp come on. I’ll get it down for you if you come back inside.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : situation handled. Carry on, young people.

 **S4:** did that just happen?

 **S2:** Sam, listen. Sneakpeeks is an MLM

 **BT:** omg me toooooooooooooooo

 **BT:** it’s how I knew we were meant to be partners.

 **S4:** wait what

 **S3:** AHAHAHAHAHAH

 **BT:** thank you louis

 **S2:** 1) I’m so proud of you for coming out like this 2) I mean MLM like multi-level marketing scheme. They’re a pyramid scheme, Sam. That’s illegal.

 **BT:** OH

 **BT:** OH

 **BT:** OH

 **BT:** See that’s where you’re WRONG, ANGELA.

 **S2:** my name is Angel?

 **BT:** Sneakpeeks is NOoooooOOOOooT a pyramid scheme precisely BECAUSE they’re illegal. God, no one even does those anymore. See, Sneakpeeks is a direct SALES company, Angelica.

 **S2:** I

 **S3:** 10/10 stars. Oscar worthy. Sounds just like my cousin.

 **S2:** louis is this a joke? Please explain.

 **S3:** it’s def a joke.

 **BT:** I’m not joking guyzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

 **BT:** Now if you’ll EXCUSE ME. My team lead is calling and we have a meeting between all of the other tasks I’m able to do with my life because I have aLL THIS FUCKING FREEDOM now, thanks to my AMaaaaaaaaaAAAAaaaZING decision to sign on with Sneakpeeks. Okay ily byeeeeeeeeeeeee

 **S2:** this

 **S4:** is

 **S2:** terrifying.

 **DD:** hello, do I look blind enough? Can someone please verify that I look blind?

 **S2:** what the actual fuck is going on in your house right now?

Sam abandoned these naysayers to go back to twitter and found that he had no less than forty people in his DMs, asking if the shoes were still available.

That shit was wild.

And they sure were still available.

Sam looked for the people with the most obnoxious watches in their profile pictures, hiked up the price and sent them a shittily lit image of the shoes that had come in their boxes.

He rolled around on his bed in wild fascination when both parties said that they’d take them without even asking for the shoe size.

Fuckin’ _stunning_. Rich people were absolutely beyond him. Imagine buying a pair of shoes without even thinking about whether or not they’d fit. _Imagine that fucking world_.

They deserved to be swindled.

Annnnnd send link.

He now had an inventory of nothing and a team lead on the other side of his phone who was shocked shitless that he’d sold his whole stock before they’d even called him to introduce themselves.

Oho, ye of little faith. See, Sam was an experienced conman. He lied to people like no one else could even dream. His very existence was a veritable tumbleweed of lies, blowing in the wind and getting crammed under people’s bumpers like the emotionally and physically expensive nightmare that it truly was.

Mrs. Berrington, you darling, blessed soul with your phone background of shrieking children, have _no_ idea what you’re messing with.

Also Sam needed more shoes. Thanks and peace, love, and rock ‘n roll.

Two pairs shoes turned into three pairs of shoes which turned into ten pairs shoes which, by the end of two weeks, turned into a solid 50 pairs of fucking shoes and Sam receiving a message from the company asking him if he was an influencer or something and if he wanted to move up the ladder.

He respectfully did not. Thanks and bye.

He hung up and went back to methodically sending links to every single page that had sent him one.

It was _so_ funny how these same people suddenly turned around and blocked him or told him that he was working for an mlm.

So. FUNNY.

 _Look in the mirror, friends and neighbors_.

Sneakpeeks was 110% a multiple-level marketing scheme notorious for being massive shitheads, but newsflash: every single one of these so called companies was the exact same. The only difference was that Sneakpeeks’s CEO and board had gotten caught.

Sam was so full of spite and rage that he didn’t even notice when he’d sold his hundredth pair of sneakers to someone who’s Instagram was full of pictures from the insides of cafes that he couldn’t even afford to breath outside of.

It was only when he got a message from Hannah warning him that she was going to stage an intervention that he emerged from his weeks-long campaign to swindle the wealthy and gazed upon the truth of what had befallen him.

He, Samuel Chung, was _good_ at direct sales.

He was in it and in _deep_.

Mortifying. Horrible. Disgusting.

He needed a shower right now.

A shower later brought Hannah an answer to her threat.

**SC:** oh my god I’m sorry I got so carried away being a troll I turned into a 40yo white suburban mother.

 **HC:** uh YEAH you did.

 **HC:** you’re terrifying, honestly. How much money did you make?

 **SC:** fuck all. Why?

 **HC:** research. How many did you sell???

 **SC:** uh hold on let me check.

 **SC:** 112?

 **HC:** YOU SOLD 112 PAIRS OF SHOES IN A MONTH SAM??

 **SC:** YES???

 **HC:** why didn’t mom put you in customer service???

 **SC:** because I was 14??

 **HC:** christ you’re so good at people. What’s that like to be good at people?

 **SC:** terrible, Hannah I have a problem.

 **HC:** is it the fact that you’ve wasted 13 years of your life on an invisibility suit?

 **SC:** no.

 **SC:** I

 **SC:** don’t laugh at me.

 **HC:** oh I’m gonna

 **SC:** okay well. Like. I think I’m done now. I’ve proved my point. How do I leave?

 **HC:** AH

 **HC:** AHAHAHA

 **HC:** AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 **HC:** you fucking idiot, Sammy.

 **HC:** you don’t.

His phone was buzzing. It was his team lead.

Oh, no. Oh no oh no oh no oh no.

It wasn’t supposed to go this far. Sam had just gotten angry. He’d been so irrationally angry. How—what—Did he answer?

He picked up.

“Hello?” he asked.

“Sammy!” Team Lead Berrington greeted all jovial-like, “How are you doing?”

“Uh, fine,” Sam lied with shaking fingers and the urge to hysterically giggle. “You?”

“I’m doing great,” Team Lead Berrington said, “Hey, listen. I know you’re really great at selling product—like, _really_ great at selling product, but I’m gonna be real with you: I think there are more opportunities for you a little higher up the ladder if you know what I’m sayin’? You know what I’m saying, right?”

Y-yes. Sam did.

“Like, recruiting?” he warbled.

“Exactly,” Team Lead Berrington said, “Maybe ask around your friends, your neighbors. See if anyone else would like the same chance that you’ve had. It’s fun, right? You had fun? It’s it like, empowering?”

No, ma’am. Sam was shitting bricks over here. He’d never been this terrified of a phone call.

“I—uh. Actually,” he said, switching the phone to his other hand to wipe the first on his pants. “I was thinking that maybe I’m ready to, uh, transition out. I, uh. You know, this was just a phase. For me. I mean.”

There was silence on the other side of the line.

“You want to leave?” Team Lead Berrington said.

Mmmmmmmmmmyes.

If that would be okay.

“You want to _leave_?”

Mm…yes? Yes? Pretty please? With icing and sugar and all God’s angels on top?

“Are you—did something happen?”

“No,” Sam said, “It’s not that. It’s just, I, uh. I actually have a full-time job right now. And a nightjob. And like, something’s gotta give, amiright?”

There was no one here to nudge gamely and so the line fell lame and flat to the floor.

“This is a big decision,” Team Lead Berrington said, “How about you sleep on it, hm?”

HHHHHH.

Okay.

He’d sleep on it.

“That’s a good boy. You sleep on it. We’ll talk tomorrow. Bye, Sam!”

Bye.

He hung up and gasped out loud. He clutched at his knees.

**BT:** HELLO I FUCKED UP HELP

 **SM:** omg me tooooooo

 **S2:** Spidey what’s that?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : oh you hear that too?

 **S2:** I hear it. I hear it.

 **S3:** I hear it too. It sounds like the sweet, sweet call of regularly attending therapy again.

 **SM:** IM NOT MANIC IM JUST STRESSED

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : 👀 sure you are

 **SM:** fuck you and the horse you rode in and FUCK the guy who shoed that horse and hey while I’m at it FUCK th

 **BT:** Peter I need you to sit back right now I have real problems. Hi my name is Sam and I’m stuck in an MLM. I can’t leave. My team lead is going to cry herself to sleep if I do and she has 4 kids and she really needs the income and they can’t go to college if I leave and oh my GOD WHAT IF THEY DON’T GO TO COLLEGE

 **SM:** …

 **S3:** …

 **S2:** sigh

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : wow look at this kid’s headspace. You’re good and brainwashed aren’t you, champ?

 **BT:** brainwashed????

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : bless

 **SM:** Sam you realize that she’s making money off like, you and the 40 other people she’s strong-armed into hoarding products, right?

 **BT:** I mean. Yes. Most people in this kind of thing might do that. But Jane would never. She has 4 children, Peter. 4. She’s a good mom. She only does this because her husband got hit by a car last year and had to get physical therapy and was off work for so long they were having trouble paying the mortgage

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Redthew. Paging Redthew.

 **DD:** what

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : please see what your kid is spewing

 **DD:** k one second.

 **S2:** Sam. That’s the brainwashing.

 **BT:** But I was just selling shoesssssssssss. I didn’t sign up for brainwashing. I didn’t go to a single conference. I didn’t even read the handbook.

 **S3:** I legit don’t know what to say to this except, like, are you sitting down?

 **BT:** no I can’t sit I’m PANICKING louis. It’s like. Jane’s working so hard and I know it’s not for the best thing but like, she checks in with me all the time and she’s really nice and I don’t want to let her or anyone else on the team down they’re all doing the best they can and some of them look up to me???

 **S3:** okay nvm then

 **S4:** Is no one going to say it?

 **S2:** Bitsy, it’s probably best if Red says it.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : oh you adorable babies. Red wouldn’t recognize this if it shot him in the face.

 **SM:** Sam, haven’t you already been in a cult?

The question was like a slap to the face.

**BT:** what do you mean?

 **SM:** I mean like, haven’t you already been part of a cult? The church thing that your mom and you were part of? Wasn’t that like, a cult?

 **BT:** you mean the old church?

 **SM:** no no. the cult.

 **BT:** re

 **BT:** religion?

 **SM:** no babe. That was a cult.

 **BT:** I’m? No.

 **BT:** no that’s something else. That was church. We did that because

 **S2:** because?

 **BT:** **oh my god**

 **DD:** this is about the shoe thing?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : see? Did I tell you or did I tell you? He read all that and came back here with not a dime more than ‘the shoe thing.’

 **S2:** Wade how could you know that?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Because these two have a chronic case of the blind leading the blind

 **DD:** are you making fun of me?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : yes

 **SM:** Matt was brainwashed by a cult member too, guys, don’t mind him. He’s normalized the signs.

 **DD:** how dare you

 **DD: [voice message]** I wasn’t admitted to even the outer circle of the Chaste. I didn’t get past basic training.

 **S2:** the what?

 **S4:** another church??

 **DD:** no

 **S3:** yeah, no. that sounds like a cult, DD. Just the name does it.

 **DD:** Explain.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : right see? He ain’t seeing it. so this is no one’s fault.

 **S2:** red I’m sorry I’m receiving mixed messages here: were you or were you not part of a cult?

 **DD:** it’s complicated

 **SM:** it’s not

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : it’s not

 **DD:** it’s my life and I say it’s complicated so its complicated.

 **BT:** Okay but the Hand is definitely a cult. The Sheltering Hands, yeah, okay, was maybe a cult. Maybe. For Mom. I wasn’t as involved as she was.

 **S2:** someone help me understand how you can be ‘not part of a cult’ but ‘less involved’ with it at the same time.

 **BT:** I JOINED ANOTHER CULT??

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : atta boy, he got there in the end.

 **DD:** nonsense, this isn’t a cult, it’s a pyramid scheme. There is crossover but the two are mostly distinct.

 **BT:** thanks teach 🥺

 **S2:** no no, you two aren’t allowed to give each other information on this, I think. Wade?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : confirm. You both have cult personalities.

 **DD: [voice message]** I wasn’t in a fucking cult, you lumbering piece of shit. Stick didn’t even like the Chaste, anyways.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : my friend, Stick hated everyone and you specifically.

 **DD:** you wanna go?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : fuck yeah I do

 **S2:** who’s Stick?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Driver of Red’s tragic backstory.

 **S3:** Omg we unlocked Red’s tragic backstory??

 **DD:** no

 **SM:** idk if y’all want that. It’s a lot.

 **DD: [voice message]** My level of trauma has required a lifelong ‘support team,’ thanks very much.

 **S4:** Wait so, going back a bit: BT joined a cult?

 **BT:** pyramid scheme.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Wannabe cult

 **BT:** no, we just went through this. that was the Sheltering Hands

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : idk what that means kid

 **SM:** that was the cult his mom was part of

 **BT:** WANNABE CULT

 **DD:** it wasn’t a cult. it was a sect of the Hand.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : …the Hand, as in the cult?

 **DD:** yes

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : Redthew baby you’re so precious it’s right in front of your face.

 **DD:** what is?

 **SM:** Sam, just stop hate-selling stuff. Easy as that.

 **BT:** okay no problem.

 **SM:** don’t answer any phone calls from your whoever.

 **BT:** team lead.

 **SM:** yeah. Block the emails, laugh it off, tell everyone that the whole thing was a joke and you’re done and you DON’T recommend it.

 **BT:** yes okay thank you, Clarity.

 **SM:** yeah and maybe don’t join any more organizations. I’m seeing a pattern here.

 **BT:** what’s the pattern?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : c u l t s

 **DD:** this is not a cult. I don’t know how many times I must say this.

 **S4:** hey red what’s the Hand?

 **DD:** why are you asking that question? Did they speak to you? take the kill shot they’re immortal don’t hold back.

 **S2:** WHAT

 **S3:** I’m SORRY????

 **S4:** o

 **S4:** k?

 **SM:** yeah see this is why y’all don’t ask Red questions.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : what if I infiltrated the Hand?

 **DD:** then I’m morally obligated to alert Rand of your presence and let him fist you.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : OHOHOHOHOHO now that’s what I’m talkin’ about

 **SM:** I’m ending this conversation. I’m ending it.

 **S2:** helLO???

 **S3:** oh my god

 **D2:** oh hey, Sam, you’re doing Sneakpeeks!

 **D2:** My sister did them for a little while, then they tried to invite her to a conference thing but there were only 7 people when she showed up and they were all talking about a retreat to the desert. Seems a little sketch to me, maybe don’t go for that one!

 **S2:** DAVID WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS LATE WITH VITAL INFO?

 **BT:** I’m sorry can you say that in different words?

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : body snatchers

 **BT:** those are the worst ones possible thank you

 **BT:** I no longer have any guilt for leaving this company.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : here to help 👍

 **DD:** Apologies, Wade. I have a pact with Rand to alert him of machinations regarding the hand. I have now done so. He is hunting for your present location.

 **DP (´** **｡** **✪ω** **✪** **｡´)** : well, give a guy some warning why don’t you?

 **SM:** OLD MEN.

 **SM:** You’re done. Both of you. Someone change the subject **now _._**

And just like that, Sam was sat back in his room alone with the knowledge that he had a certified tendency to be drawn in towards organizations that may or may not be cults.

How heartening.

How enlightening.

He needed to talk to someone.

Matt was arguing with Foggy upstairs over whether or not his teacher was a cult member, which was perfect because Foggy took no prisoners over this kind of thing.

He grabbed Matt’s face just as Sam came up the stairs and held it tight.

“You,” he said, not unlovingly, “Were brainwashed at 11 years old to be trained as a warrior to fight an organization of evil who you continue to fight to this day, Matthew. Stick found you, isolated you, and abused you to keep you in line for that express purpose. What does that sound like to you?”

Sam clutched at the banister in anticipation of the answer.

“A problem?” Matt tried.

“That’s some cult bullshit,” Foggy snarled.

Matt had the decency to look ashamed this time.

“Right, so good point well made, but he wasn’t really a _part_ of—”

“No buts!”

“But—”

“Zero asses. This man’s name does not deserve our breath--Hi, Sammy, did you need something?”

Sam needed this bannister not to give in ever because it was the only thing keeping him standing, but he also needed Foggy to hold his head between his knowledgeable hands.

“Foggy, did I join a cult?” he asked miserably.

Foggy’s gaze went hard, then softened. He held out a hand. Sam bypassed Matt to take it and soon found himself in the same position that Matt had been in.

At least Foggy’s hands didn’t feel like sandpaper.

“You,” Foggy told him much more gently than he’d told Matt, “Were led into a religious sect created by a charismatic leader with your mother. You were a follower of that man, not out of a sense of malice, but out of desperation. Which means, my dear, that yes. You joined a cult.”

Terrifying.

“How do I not do that anymore?” Sam asked when Foggy released his face.

“Critical thinking, do not use your teacher as an example,” Foggy prescribed. “And no more direct sales. Structure’s too similar for comfort. It’s morally reprehensible anyways.”

Got it.

Thanks, Fogs.

**@blindspot:** I emerge on the other end of a journey enlightened, twitter. My enlightenment is thus: Sneakpeeks is a scam and SUPER emotionally manipulative. Even doing it out of spite for all y’all trying to make a buck on my posts fucked me up. Do not recommend.

 **@blindspot:** stop trying to make money on my posts. It’s tacky.

 **@blindspot:** also if I successfully sold you some shoes, consider yourself a chump. I targeted you because you look like a rich dick and 80% of you didn’t even ask for the size when you ordered. That’s a bad look man ❤

His usual followers appeared to breathe a sigh of relief. Sam appreciated them. But more than that, he had someone else to thank for being so honest.

**SC:** hey Peter you’re a doll

 **PP:** I know

 **PP:** wait what did I do?

 **SC:** lol don’t worry about it.

Case closed.

**Author's Note:**

> I joke here obviously, but like. For real, cults are super fucking dangerous and detrimental to people, and many do actually take on the form of like, multi-level marketing systems in how they target desperate people and how they rely on ideas of self-empowerment. So be careful friends! Keep your eyes out for yourselves and your friends and neighbors.


End file.
